A Sailor's Joke

The skipper spent an evening of hard drinking with his sailing buddies. After midnight the drunken skipper returned to his boat. He was determined to sneak aboard without waking his wife. He managed to get into the cockpit, opened the hatch and started to climb down the steep ladder. Alas he slipped and fell off the ladder landing on his rear with a whiskey bottle in each back pocket. Still he managed to avoid a scream and there was no sound from his wife.

Wounded from the broken glass, the skipper looked in the full length mirror. His butt was covered with cuts and bleeding profusely. He went into the head, found a full box of band aids and returned to the mirror. With pants around his ankles and bending over to look behind him, the skipper bandaged the cuts one by one until all were covered. Then he snuck into bed and in and was fast asleep in an instant.

The next afternoon the hung over skipper got up and confronted his wife. "You drunken sot, I'm disgusted with you." she said. "But how did you know?" said the skipper, "I didn't make any noise." "Well," said the wife, "It could have been the open companionway hatch. It could have been the blood and the broken glass on the floor. But the final straw was the bandages all over the mirror."

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