Determination

Onboard Southwest Flight 1295

If you want to live your dream, determination is what it takes. That's what kept Libby and I going for the past two months. I had no idea that retirement could be such hard work.

What have we been doing? To review for our readers, we sailed Tarwathie as far north as Jacksonville; much less distance than we hoped to make. We hired a slip for two months and broke off the sailing in order to be back home for Easter. The project plan was to get the house sold, or at least listed on the real estate market. It proved to be harder than we thought.

We cleaned, we painted, and we pruned personal belongings. I sold stuff on Ebay and on Amazon.com. We spruced the yard, we wrote wills and medical proxies. we digitized and organized 40 years of family photos for the benefit of our families. Libby quit her job at ARC, (that was emotionally wrenching for Libby.) We arranged travel and insurance, and documentation. We ordered our finances. We held a yard sale. I informed my sister Marylyn that we were moving away. She lives in a group home and Libby and I were the only remaining family she has within hundreds of miles. We made arrangements for pets. I quit the fire department. In short, we've accomplished hundreds of one-time chores.

In the middle of April we enjoyed a pleasant break. Ken and Sonja, dear friends from Sweden paid a visit. We had a great couple of days with them. One thing we did with them was to go to the New York State Museum to see the 9/11 exhibits. We watched the documentary film with footage I never saw before. One scene showed the fire commanders on the ground floor of the South Tower at the instant that the North Tower collapsed. The noise and the shaking were unbelievable. The firemen looked up and around in bewilderment. Then, suddenly everything went black as the air filled with opaque dust. I was stunned and completely overwhelmed with emotion. I cried for half an hour. First time I cried since my parents died.

We also had setbacks. Right around Easter, I overdid yard work and gave myself a severe case of tendonitis in the knee. It was the first time in my life I had trouble like that. It immobilized me for nearly two weeks. The real estate agent told us that banks would no longer give loans on houses with dug wells. We had to pay to have a new well drilled just to make the house salable. Libby got an unexpected bill in the mail from IRS from an inheritance she got years ago. On the very last day before listing the house, I discovered serious damage to the foundation of the house. We need to have part of the foundation replaced before selling the house. We feel like Perseus; tormented by gods throwing obstacles in his way.

Ay. Ay. Ay. In recent weeks, Libby and I came to look each other in the eye several times per day and say, "We'll get through this." I'm afraid to ask her if she loves the sailing life dream as much now as she did before. She must be as determined as I am, or she must love me very much and be exceedingly loyal or some combination of those. I'm very lucky to have her and I love her very much indeed.

Our work is not done. We'll sail Tarwathie to the Albany area. Hopefully the house will be sold. I'll rent a self store cube. Then we'll move the furniture out, and transport it, some to kids and some to storage. We'll ship the dog to Alaska to live with my son David. That will be exceedingly hard to do emotionally. Around the end of July we should be ready to sail away on Tarwathie, free of the responsibilities of all stuff that's not onboard. I'm sure that Libby and I will both feel freed of an enormous burden.

Determination is what it takes. So far we remain determined to succeed and our plans remain intact. The cost is mental and physical exhaustion for both of us, plus tens of thousands of dollars subtracted from our nest egg. Someday I'll write an article entitled, "Prisoners of Our Stuff." At this point in time I can see very clearly how people become slaves to the responsibilities created by owning stuff.

The situation right now is that I'm flying to Jacksonville as I write. Libby is staying behind another 10 days because we still have contractors working on the house. I can't stay with her because Tarwathie must be moved by the 24th. I plan to sail her up to Fredonia Beach. There I'll haul her up on land and kill a week or so repainting the bottom with ablative anti-fouling paint. I'll also try to repair the anchor roller.