In Harm's Way

February 11, 2006

Yesterday our youngest son David graduated from US Army basic training and infantry school. After graduation, and before the end of this year, David will be in Iraq, standing in harm’s way in defense of our country. Libby and I and our oldest son John and our grandson Nick all attended the graduation ceremony. The keynote speaker at the ceremony was a black man named White. We did not catch his rank, but let me call him Major White. Major White’s speech was intended to motivate the troops, but it had a strong emotional effect on both Libby and I. I want to write about the impression it made.

All military ceremonies of this kind must share some common elements. There is a lot of marching and displays of disciplined behavior. There is also a lot of patriotic music. These things together remind us of tradition. In this respect there is little difference between today’s warrior and countless millions of warriors from every society since the dawn of civilization. The rituals touch our emotional hot spots and have the effect of motivating us to be willing to make great sacrifices. At this point I thought of David and how he now belonged to the proud ranks of fellow warriors. That is what the words of Major White’s speech said, but the words were hardly necessary. The rituals and the music conveyed that message at a much deeper level.

I also thought of Libby and I, but mostly Libby. We are two of other countless millions of parents who have sent their sons off to war. The impact of this falls heaviest on the mother. A mother’s instinct and her whole being is directed toward protecting her children. To willingly send a child into harm’s way violently clashes with basic emotions. It amazes me how effectively America’s propaganda machine convinces American mothers to allow their sons to be sent away to war. That is one of the major underpinnings of America’s might and effectiveness as a superpower; we are willing.

A father also shares instincts to protect his family, so I shared Libby’s distress over the nature of what David was doing. Notwithstanding that, a father’s feelings are powerfully mitigated by his desire to stand up himself to fight our wars. When the father is unable or unsuitable to fight himself, he is duty bound to offer up his sons as the family’s offering to the nation’s causes. His sons become his proxy warriors. Their pride becomes in part my pride and my chest swells.

Then, Major White described the training these men had received and how formidable the American soldier is and how these soldiers could defeat any enemy in the world. I reflected on the reality of that statement and I thought about America‘s enemies. Undoubtedly, in today’s world that is a very true statement. No conceivable modern enemy can challenge the American soldier in battle. These young boys, now men, carry the responsibility of wielding immense power. America may not win every conflict. War is not the solution to every problem. Still, to fight and kill in battle, no enemy can challenge America. All sane enemies must understand that, and must be appropriately deterred in their actions. An enemy may hope to subvert America’s will to resist, but they can never expect to defeat us in battle. If I were a citizen of any other country, I would not be able to say that.

Next, Major White talked about selfless sacrifice. That made me and Libby think about those other young soldiers and their family members who surrounded us in the audience. What a supremely commendable action that is to volunteer to go to war. How unevenly the burdens and sacrifices fall upon American citizens and American families. The vast majority of families have no direct personal involvement of family members in our wars. )If the USA had universal military duty like Sweden and Switzerland had, we would have an army of ten to fifteen million men. That would be a far too big army and it would be dangerous to the country and the world to have such a big force in existence.) Of the minority of families who send one or more members off to war, a much smaller minority will suffer the death of their beloved as a result. In this respect, we are very fortunate to live in the modern era, rather than earlier ages when almost all of those sent off to war would die.

David, I’m certain, volunteered out of a sense of duty. So certain am I that it just occurred to me that I never asked David that question directly. Standing shoulder to shoulder with David though was an assortment of young men. Many of those young men are different than David. Some joined the Army to escape the circumstances of their civilian life. Others were pressured into joining by families or counselors in the hope that the military could make difficult boys into men. Still others merely continue a family tradition. Looking at the families surrounding us at the graduation ceremony it is also clear that the self sacrifice of military service is a strong family trait. I’m sure that it was no accident that John decided to bring my 14 year old grandson Nick to witness these events.

America never tires of telling our veterans and their families how much we appreciate their sacrifice. That’s nice but words of gratitude can never be enough compensation for the vastly uneven sacrifice of the few for the benefit of the many.

Good reasons or bad, exploitive or not, the military takes them all, turns the crank, and produces soldiers fit for war. The unfairness and exploitation of the system weighs on my conscience at the same time my brain tells me how necessary it is to make an effective army. Fighting in combat is an insane act. America is a formidable enemy precisely because we manage the self deception necessary to motivate citizens to volunteer and to train soldiers to charge into the face of death if necessary. I thought then of armies past and present, and of military traditions, and what it really means for David to join the cadre of warriors.

Finally, Major White said something that hit me like a ton of bricks. He said, “I will never, never ever, apologize for being an American.” When he said that I was reminded of the words of General Colin Powell that I read on a plaque the day before. General Powell was confronted by skeptics in Switzerland who wanted to label the war in Iraq as American imperialism. Powell then said, "We have gone forth from our shores repeatedly over the last hundred years and we’ve done this as recently as the last year in Afghanistan and put wonderful young men and women at risk, many of whom have lost their lives, and we have asked for nothing except enough ground to bury them in, and otherwise we have returned home to seek our own, you know, to seek our own lives in peace, to live our own lives in peace. But there comes a time when soft power or talking with evil will not work where, unfortunately, hard power is the only thing that works."

The words of Major White and General Powell hit home because in recent months I’ve been contemplating cruising the world during a time when anti-American passions are exceptionally high. Frankly, I had been considering not flying the American flag as we sailed to other countries. Those words, coupled with the exemplary bravery of my two sons, made me realize in an instant how wrong that would be. I’ll never forget those words and I resolve hereto to follow the example of my own sons. I commit myself to never ever apologize for being an American.

In 1994, our oldest son, John, graduated from basic training. John is also a warrior. He serves with the US Air Force. Unfortunately, we didn’t get to attend John’ s graduation. Also, at that time and up to now, there was no serious chance of John being called to fight in actual combat. That could change overnight, but so far it is not a a reality.

I’m proud of John and his sacrifices. I’m very proud of David and his selfless sacrifice and for the service he is about to perform. I’m also proud of America for it’s willingness to fight for right. I’m also grateful to America’s military for being so effective at it’s business and I’m grateful to General Colin Powell and to Major White for their eloquent words that bring it all home.